Turning Strangers Into Friends: Do you find it easy to make conversation with new people you’ve just met? Or does the thought of trying to make conversation with someone new make you break out in a cold sweat?
If you don’t feel comfortable making casual conversation with new people you have just met, you will find it harder to make new friends, You will also find it more difficult to fit in at your workplace.
Why You Should Turn Strangers Into Friends
One of the most common reasons that people have difficulty making conversation with someone they donít know very well is because they put too much pressure on themselves. They think they have to really put up a great performance to impress the other person. They don’t just let themselves just be ordinary, and talk about fairly ordinary things.
Here is a very important lesson to learn about making conversation with people: When you insist to yourself that you have to be brilliant and dazzling in all your conversations, this belief will not win you new friends.
It will not even improve your conversational performance. When you think to yourself that you have to perform perfectly in all your conversations, you will actually make your performance worse! You will become too nervous and awkward, and you’ll be too focused on your own performance.
Steps to Turn Strangers Into Connections
You won’t be focused on getting to know the new person you’ve just met. New people that you meet are not looking for brilliant conversation. What they are looking for is someone who will be comfortable to be with, and fun to talk to. But most of all they are looking for someone who seems interested in them!
1. Look Approachable
Everyone has witnessed someone with their heads bowed while crossing a hallway or absorbed in their phone when seated at a meal.
They are expressing their disinterest in being disturbed by their body language, which speaks volumes.
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2. Say Hello
A brief “hi” will help break the ice, for instance an hotel staff is required to make eye contact with guests and nod politely whenever they are within 15 feet of them. The employee is required to greet anyone within five feet with a smile.
3. Assume the Other Person is Shy
According to statistics, 70% of people profess to be shy. This puts you in the same situation as me.
Talking to a stranger doesn’t require you to be an extrovert “We’re all so concerned with what others may think of us.
The reality is that nobody cares since everyone is preoccupied with themselves. Instead, shift your attention from you to the other person.
The most effective network builders I know are timid, but that doesn’t stop them from building strong networks, “They just understand that working with others is necessary to achieve their goals, and they step outside their comfort zone.”
4. Look for a Common Ground
Find anything you have in common with the other person and strike up a conversation, whether it be a mutual friend, a common location, an experience, or a similar viewpoint.
In addition to the weather, which is always a safe subject, you can also inquire about the person’s children or pets. or keep an eye on your surroundings.
5. Be Fully Present and Listen
When you are with them, be sure to give the folks you are meeting your undivided attention. Bill Clinton is renowned for his capacity to be fully present even when he only has a brief interaction with a person.
An eight-second attention span is typical. You become more remembered and your communication is deeper when you pay attention.
6. Decide Whether Or Not To Advance To The Next Step
If you start a conversation with someone in a parking lot, it’s likely that you won’t see them again, but if you discuss anything worthwhile, it’s acceptable to ask for their business card.
Send a thank-you email as a follow-up within 24 hours. “Send valuable content within a week, such as an article you believe the recipient would find interesting. The emphasis is still on developing a friendship between strangers.
Why it is Important to Turn Strangers Into Friends
For conversational success, it’s more important to be a good listener than to be a great talker. When you are just starting out talking to a person, you can use your immediate surroundings or the weather as a basis for a few starting remarks. If you want to know that person better, move on quickly to a slightly more personal level of discussion.
Ask a few basic questions and offer a little bit of information about yourself, your likes or dislikes, or your opinion on some neutral topic. Notice whether the other person lights up with interest about any topics you mention.
This can give you new interesting areas for both of you to discuss. Even if it seems somewhat difficult and awkward for you in the beginning, develop the habit of introducing yourself to others as soon as you meet them, or very early in the conversation.
Otherwise you could spend hours talking and neither of you will have any idea of what your conversation partners name is.
Socially confident people introduce themselves to their conversation partners very early in the course of conversation. People who are shy or socially awkward tend to introduce themselves much later, or not at all. Shy people often wait until someone asks for their name, but they rarely volunteer to give it, and they rarely ask the other person what their name is.
Make Friend with Strangers
Sometimes it is easier to ask the other person for their name first, and then offer your own.
If you practice the new behavior enough times, it will eventually become second nature to you. With enough practice, it will no longer seem intimidating to take a more active role.
The important thing is simply to develop the habit of starting simple little conversations with lots more people.
Look for the interests you have in common. If you want to be more socially successful, take the initiative to introduce yourself to new people and to get the conversational ball rolling. Don’t hold back and let other people make all the first moves.
If you have been holding back, waiting for other people to do all the work in the relationship, you are shirking your responsibility in making the relationship move forward. Show interest in other people, Smile, Listen and Look at the person you’re talking with.
Whenever you start talking to new people, don’t strive for great dialogue, or the perfect opening lines. Just get started, and keep on talking. Practice making conversations with a lot of new people. You will eventually get better at it. Don’t decide that you’re a failure if the encounter doesn’t turn into a great friendship.
However, the truth is that the majority of conversations between new people don’t really go anywhere, that is all right.
It takes time and effort to turn casual strangers into friends. Remember, that all of the friends you already have were strangers to you at one point in your life. Until you started talking and found out what you have in common.
Learning how to make conversation with people you don’t know well can be the first step in making many new friends.
Many individuals all across the world have benefited from these tips, and I’m confident you won’t be left behind. Please let me know how we can continue to support you.
If you would like additional support, you may schedule a consultation here.
